Whenever you were born, there is a name for your generation. There’s “The Greatest Generation,” “Baby Boomers,” “Gen X,” “Gen Z,” “Millennials,” etc. The name is kind of a shorthand used to describe the generation – as if all members of a particular generation have a uniform set of behaviors and attitudes.
Those of us who work with or have social involvements with members of other generations, especially if they are not members of our family, recognize that there is considerable diversity among people who were born around the same time. Logically, that makes sense. Sharing a birth date in the same decade or so is just one factor that helps shape behaviors, aspirations, social attitudes, political affiliations, and other characteristics. Family circumstances, geography, role models, peers, and education are among the hundreds of influences to go into the development of each person’s unique personality.
Admittedly, there is no doubt that growing up at the same time in the world’s history helps to somewhat homogenize a generation. Living through a depression or war or climate crisis or a time of peace and abundance does create some shared attitudes and behaviors for much of any particular generation. It also creates a certain generational self-centeredness that tends to make us believe that each subsequent generation is screwing things up much worse than we did. This belief becomes exaggerated if our only non-family social involvements are with other members of our own generation.
There is a number of problems with that, but two in particular stand out. One problem is the same as occurs whenever there is an absence of diversity – whether it be racial, religious, economic, or by age. It makes people more vulnerable to prejudice and bigotry based upon lack of knowledge about the other person. The second problem is particularly applicable to older folks like me. Unless a person has younger friends, there is less incentive to become aware of changes that are occurring – whether it be in acquisition of general knowledge, technology, health breakthroughs, or the impact of pending legislation upon the rest of the population. This can lead to a sense of detachment from the rest of the world and ultimately the feeling of being irrelevant to everybody other than your closest friends and family – and irrelevance is often a precursor to loneliness. From my work with older adults, I can attest to the fact that fear of irrelevance is a very real fear of older adulthood.
These problems are ones that fortunately have a solution. It starts with determining that you will not be generically defined by the generation into which you were born. Next, get yourself involved with groups or classes or projects at work or in the community that put you in contact with a diverse group of individuals that cut across generational boundaries to work or learn about some sort of interest that is not limited to a particular age group, but rather shared among the generations. It may not be comfortable at first, but it will be rewarding. Progress begins to take place when you leave your comfort zone.
And if that proves to be a tough challenge for you, the first thing that you can do is congratulate yourself for being willing to take on a tough challenge. Next, feel free to contact me (ronkaiser01@gmail.com), and let’s have a conversation about how to lead your life in a way that isn’t defined by your generation but by your commitment to have a diverse group of friends – including friends who are not of your generation.