In recent days, our country and our world has been faced with another unspeakable tragedy as a gunman killed nine people whose activities that evening brought them to the seemingly safe haven of a church in South Carolina.
While the media and the general public have been focused upon the mental state and possible motives of the killer, another thing emerged that is worthy of emphasizing. While facing the accused killer of their loved ones via television monitor at a hearing, family member after family member described the emotional pain inflicted upon them – and then concluded by telling the accused killer that they forgive him.
While I cannot begin to to fathom the emotional turmoil that they are experiencing, let alone understanding the emotional strength that they had to summon in order to forgive, I can appreciate the example that they have collectively set for all of us.
Their actions made me think of the number of times that I’ve been slow to forgive someone for a perceived wrong – no matter how slight and unintended it may have been? And how often have I allowed stubbornness to limit my willingness to ask for forgiveness because it would have required me to admit that I made a mistake?
I suspect that I’m not alone in these types of actions that result in interfering with trust and honesty and compassion in interpersonal relationships. In fact, I suspect that I’m more willing than most to seek and accept forgiveness. But I can think of several examples right off the top of my head where I could have done a better job in this regard.
I’m committing myself to righting some of these wrongs ASAP. If you have some “unfinished business” in the forgiveness area, I hope that you will make the same pledge. It’s a healthy thing to do.