Some of us enter a new year by resolving to make certain behavior changes – relative to personal habits or interests or career directions or how we treat others. It is easier to decide to change a behavior than it is to actually change it. The large number of people who fail to maintain a…
While the approaching New Year marks a time for making resolutions and preparing for a new start, something else should be taking place in addition to planning ahead. Before making New Year’s resolutions, I always encourage people to do a “Success Audit” for the previous year. There is nothing wrong with making resolutions (aside from…
Once again in the United States, we are confronted with a horrendous and unthinkable tragedy. In an elementary school designed for learning in a safe environment, 26 innocent people were killed by the bullets of an individual who had given up his right to be called a member of the human race. Making this tragedy…
Mirrors are designed to help you see yourself objectively – as others see you. It doesn’t always work out that way. Those of us who have worked with patients with eating disorders are well aware of the fact that anorexic patients who are objectively skinny can see themselves as being fat? Some attractive patients can…
Thanksgiving just passed, marking the beginning of the holiday season. Most major faiths celebrate important holidays in the next several weeks, and this is also a time for joy and celebration among most individuals – whether they are spiritual or not. Commercialization and other excesses, however, cause some people to face the holidays with trepidation. …
That famous philosopher, Yogi Berra, made a profound statement in his own special way when he said, “If you don’t go to other people’s funerals, they won’t come to yours”. Despite the impracticality of achieving all parts of that idea, the thought behind it is very appropriate. One of the best things that you can…
It’s a very common but self-defeating characteristic. I’m speaking of the tendency of so many people to downplay their positive traits – which then leads giving a negative spin to something that is objectively good. I’ve worked with women who, when asked what they do for work, say they are, “just a housewife” – despite…
I hear variations of the same theme a few times a week in may office as patients tell me: “I’ve been following my diet for a week and I haven’t lost any weight”; I’ve made a deliberate attempt to speak up in class this semester and I still feel nervous when I do”; I’ve gone…
In working with patients as well as communicating through this website, I have long advocated for incorporating change into your lifestyle by resolving to make small ongoing changes in three areas: health and fitness; activities that involve thinking; and the social area – particularly involving helping others. I have described the process of making changes…
Probably the most often used exercise in the field of positive psychology is known as the “3 Good Things” exercise. To do the exercise, you select a time – bedtime is the most typical time – identify 3 things that went well during the day, write them down, and reflect upon what caused them to…
One of the components of Goal-Achieving Psychotherapy, the approach that I use in working with patients, is that the therapist is a role model. I have found that I can be most successful when I am feeling positive, healthy, competent, and clearly able to convey my desire to help. I have stated that it is…