There is a consistent body of research demonstrating that being involved with others is associated with emotional health, and the impact upon personal mental health is even greater when that involvement includes helping others. Involvement in helping others is not only a form of increased socialization, but there are reciprocal benefits. When you do good…
Winning Isn’t Everything – But It’s Not Nothing Either
Woody Allen has been quoted as saying the 80% of success is just showing up. Although there is obvious humor in that quote, there is also a good deal of truth to it – in both directions. If you show up and participate, you have a lot better chance of having your talents noticed and…
Write Down Your Goals
Most of us have more good ideas, intentions, and plans than we ever achieve. We increase the chances of achieving them if we turn them into goals. Certain behaviors are important in order to transform our thoughts into goals. We move from having thoughts to having behaviors when we establish goals that are concrete, realistic,…
Learning From Our Mistakes
Thomas Edison said it best: “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Anybody who has achieved anything has made mistakes along the way. The only way to avoid mistakes is to take the safest course, aim below our potential, and not try anything new. Making a mistake should not be…
Do You Have Any Personal Stop Signs?
When I drive down the road and I see a sign that reads, STOP, I stop. I generally don’t try to figure out why the sign was placed there. I assume that most stop signs are there for a purpose. They are not the result of some random process but rather are placed where they…
What Do You Like About Yourself?
It’s not a trick question. What do you like about yourself? When I ask that question of my therapy patients, as I inevitably do, the number who struggle to find an answer never fails to amaze me. Happily some are able to answer the question quickly and forthrightly. Too many others, however, are eager to try…
Choose To Be Positive
There is a lot of research verifying the fact that positive people tend to accomplish more and have better health. The research is all well and good, but observation is also important. And there is one thing that I have yet to observe. I’ve never observed a positive-oriented person suggest that s/he would somehow be…
Don’t Play “Prevent Defense”
Some preseason games have already been played, and it is only a few short weeks until the games that count begin. Football season will soon be upon us in America. For many of us, football has replaced baseball as our national pastime – perhaps because it’s easier to fit watching 16 games into our busy…
Is It Tragic – Or Just “Too Bad”
The late Albert Ellis, one of the pioneers in the field of Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, introduced the word, catastrophizing, into the psychology practice literature. Catastrophizing refers to the cognitive processing of information in such a way that things that are objectively annoying, inconvenient or unpleasant are treated as if they are awful, horrendous, or tragic. There is…
Who Is Whispering In Your Ear?
One of the real joys of working with people is the opportunity to be involved in their growth and change. One of the real challenges, however, occurs when I observe someone changing up to a point – and the s/he stops and either goes no further or even reverts to old behaviors. It’s almost…
Let Activity Be Your Default
One of the good things about setting goals is that it forms the basis for initiating a chain of behaviors directed at goal-achieving. As long as you stay with your plan, you will stay active in pursuit of your goals. It’s a really simple concept but an important one. If you have something to do,…